What IS This?!?!?

It's everywhere! No one is immune. It has infiltrated every part of America, striking multiple times in individual home, as if once isn't enough...

My husband's coworkers are out in droves with it...My cousins have had it, twice...My real-life friends and their kids have it...My online triplet heroes and their parents have had it...Other online friends and their real-life best friends had it recently...In fact, almost every second blog post I read seems to recount another episode in another home of washing bedding, scrubbing floors, waiting for fevers to subside, washing more bedding, coughing until lungs feel like they have exited one's body...resting deliriously in pajamas because that's all one can do...Sanitizing the house just in time for it to start all over again.

Maybe it is blogging that makes me feel like it is everywhere and inconquerable, since I'm tied in with a lot more people than I normally would have been, but there's got to be something to it. If there is anything that makes me want to become a conspiracy theorist, it's this vicious headcold-stomachvirus-feel better-headcold-stomachvirus-feel better-headcold-stomachvirus cycle that is going around and around.

This is a second time in a month that I've had to cancel preschool at my house (which totally makes me feel like an errant-hooky-playing schoolkid even though I didn't lick my hands or warm my head with a lightbulb) and I just barely returned those pink pajamas to their rightful owner, which has got to be a sign of something seriously amuck.

After waking up at 2 a.m. and helping an inconsolable and restless 4-year-old with no symptoms except that he said he felt really bad, only to get him soothed at about 4 a.m. just in time for the 2-year-old to bolt upright in his bed, announce, "I'm sick too," and actually produce real vomit, then have a sympathy-gagging pregnant mom, bed-changing, rearranging, very grouchy try-to-go-back-to-sleep fest until the 4-year-old also produces evidence of truly not feeling well, I know someone is out to get me, out to get all of us.

The sickest thing of all is that I'm most frustrated that this is delaying my cleaning-sorting-painting-nesting extravaganza that I'm crazy about finishing right now. I want to clean? Truly disturbing.

Forget the Kennedy assassination, Elvis still being alive, and the alien sightings all over America...this needs to be investigated. Pronto. Anything that Lysol, Clorox, virtual isolation, and springtime weather can't combat is bigger than us all. And I am going to get to the bottom of it!

As soon as I clean another bathroom and throw in another load of sheets.