How Do I Blog Thee?

Let me count the ways...

This is my 500th post!!!

Almost four years, two new babies, a few blog identity crises, and one foreign living experience later, Code Yellow Mom is still going. I honestly never knew if I would stick to it very long and at the beginning it was with so much trepidation that I clicked "post" each time that I didn't know if I'd hold up under the self-inflicted torture of wondering if anyone would read and, if anyone did, would they like it?

You are witness to the fact that I've obviously gotten past the idea that I need to say something profound in a completely eloquent way every single time, but I still have aspirations of saying more and writing better. And I still think of you every time I click "post."

I started the blog partly because my friend Nobody convinced me to, but mostly because I don't live near my family and thought they would like a regular glimpse into my life. Only a few family members have enthusiasticlaly taken me up on that opportunity and offered support and encouragement, but I've also gained a circle of friends and family that otherwise I would never have come in contact with. It makes me feel good to know there are people who are interested, no matter how I express it.

Recording my daily snafus and observations, sometimes with humor, sometimes with apathy, and sometimes with tears, has been a fabulously rewarding experience. As I look back on posts from when Calvin and Henry were very little, I realize that this blog is a journal and a coping mechanism, a tool for learning and for going forward as a mom. I don't think I'm the same frantic and stressed, perpetually exhausted young mother I was in April of 2006. It's nice to be able to look back and see that.

500 is a big number. A super big number, as my boys would say. And I've reached it. It feels like something to celebrate, but I don't know exactly how. Except to say thanks to those of you who have read along, commented, commiserated, advised, empathized and enjoyed with me. I love you. I really, really love you.

Where does Code Yellow go from here? I'm still thinking. I'm still growing into being a mom of four, and it has overwhelmed me more than I'd care to admit. I think it's the tipping point for either becoming a lot more organized and articulate and pulled together (in more spheres than just the blogoshpere) or else falling off the deep end. I'm pulling for the "get it together" side of me. So we'll see. I'll try to blog about it...

Here's to 500 more!

And truly, thank you for being along.